Your heart starts to sink and you have butterflies racing around your stomach; you never thought you would be in this position. You took a test and it came out positive, which was unfortunately not the outcome you were looking for. You want to settle down before you even think about having kids. You don’t feel ready and you’re scared that your future is entirely ruined now. Becoming pregnant unexpectedly happens to a lot more women that you may think, so you are not alone. When you are in this type of situation it is very easy to write yourself off and think negatively about the future. However, you have the chance to make some very prominent and important decisions in your life, which will shape you into a stronger person in the long run. You didn’t ask to become pregnant, yet you didn’t do much to prevent it either, so you need to live with the consequences. Try to remain calm and look ahead to a positive future; you can do anything if you put your mind to it. If you have recently found yourself in this kind of situation, here are some of the options you should start exploring right now.
Explore Your Options
The first thing you need to do when you find out you are expecting is to go and see your doctor. They will be able to advise you on the best steps to take for your personal circumstances. Whether they recommend a local abortion clinic or they explain the process of adoption to you, there are many options for you to explore. You might consider keeping the baby and raising it as a single parent. Whatever your decision is, your doctor will be able to help you through every step of the way. There will be a point where you have to decide once and for all what you are going to do, so don’t take too long dwelling and overthinking.
Come to Terms with the Future
Once you have made your decision you will need to start thinking about how your future is going to pan out. Will you need to get a bigger place? Will you need some extra support from your parents? Will you need to get another job to improve your financial stability? As long as you carefully consider all of the ups and downs you will be able to make a solid plan for your future.
Speak to the Father
Whoever the father of your child may be, they deserve to know what the current situation is. If you leave them in the dark about it, they will never know that they once had a child. You never know what could happen; they might step up to the plate and offer to give you the support you need. If you keep it to yourself you will never be able to find out what could be. Your baby deserves to know their father too, so make sure you give it a try.
Welcoming a baby into the world involves a lot of planning and preparation that you might not be familiar with. You will need to buy clothes, food, diapers and decorate a nursery for them. If you are struggling for space at home, then you might want to consider getting a bigger place, which will be more functional for you as a small family. Start saving up straight away as the cost of having a baby is more than you might think. As long as you can make sensible decisions, you will be able to manage this on your own.
See a Counselor
If you have been through a particularly traumatic time with your pregnancy so far, then you should seek professional advice from a counselor. With their help and support, you will be able to speak about your feelings and come to terms with your new future. A counselor or therapist will be able to provide you with non-judgemental support throughout your journey.
Join a Support Group
Speaking to other women who have been through the same experiences as you might help you to put your mind at ease throughout this journey. Joining a local support group will help you to connect with others who are feeling what you are feeling. You will be able to find strength in other women’s stories and you can build each other up over time. You might even make friends for life by joining a community group like this. There are a lot of support groups that you can join in Facebook. I personally join Cebu Mommy And Lifestyle Bloggers Group and Cebu Mommy Support Group.
See it as a Blessing in Disguise
Having a baby and being a single parent might just be one of the most prolific and happy events that ever occur to you. Your new baby could turn out to be your absolute pride and joy; although there are going to be many tough times along the road, you might just see this occurrence as a blessing in disguise.
Whatever path you choose to go down, you will become a stronger and better person because of it. Being able to survive and strive through such a huge life event will forever be one of your biggest achievements. So don’t be afraid to speak out about your journey; you could have a huge impact on someone else who is going through the same experiences. Being a single mother, going through with an abortion, or putting your child up for adoption are huge journeys to take. As long as you seek out the professional support you need, you will never feel alone. Take each day as it comes and you will slowly build up the strength to make it through. You might just have experienced one of the most momentous times in your entire life and it will stick with you forever. Hopefully, in a few years’ time, you will be able to look back and feel proud of yourself for all that you accomplished. Becoming pregnant unexpectedly is not something anybody can plan for, but you can turn it into a positive life experience eventually.
Gracina Estrella – Cabanog is a Digital Marketing and Growth Strategist for Businesses. She is a mother of two and a wife to a tech geek. When she is offline she cooks, watch TV and hangs out with friends and family on the beach. Join her free Facebook Community of Social Media Marketing Learners, too! She is the founder of the startup SparkHiveMedia.com